Deal with adversity
My son started playing with a plastic truck and as he prepared to move it along some imaginary path he had planned in his mind it soon became apparent that the myriad of other randomly arranged toys lying around were in his way.
As a rational adult my first reaction was to think about picking up the toys that were in the way, or to remove the obstacles, so I could move the truck along what I thought was the ideal trajectory, but my son didn't even think of this. Instead, he simply picked up the truck, carried it over the other obstacle toys, and continued along his merry way.
Now this got me thinking about what we adults often do (or don't do) when things get in the way of our goals or our happiness or success.
Do you focus too much on obstacles and what you think you need to do to remove them? Do you allow road blocks to distract your attention from the ultimate goal (e.g. happiness)? Because focusing on an obstacle, even if we think we’re trying to overcome it, is still focusing on an obstacle!
What would happen if we, like my son, simply stayed focused on what we wanted to achieve despite the hurdles, obstacles, challenges that frequently get in our way? Think about it...I suspect we might be far more successful and far more focused on our positive outcomes and ultimately, I suspect we'd experience far more happiness.
Now this isn’t just relevant to my son playing in the park; in fact, it’s become an integral part of my approach when I’m consulting to businesses and/or coaching executives. To give you a taste of how I apply this concept, ask yourself some or all of these questions next time you’re facing challenging or difficult times:
- What’s the best thing about this situation?
- What positives can I take from this?
- What positives can I take from this?
- How can I be better as a result of this?
- In ten years’ time will this really matter?
- How bad is this compared to the worst events in the world?
And consider the following:
- 3 billion people live on less than $2 a day
- 30,000 children die daily of preventable diseases
- 6 million children die annually from malnourishment
- 113 million children are not in school
- How bad does it seem now?
Ask yourself, also, how you can use your strengths to get through it. Are you making the most of the resources (people and other) available to you? As Edward de Bono once said, “We may need to solve problems not by removing the cause but by designing the way forward even if the cause remains in place.”
By Dr. Timothy Sharp
Looking for true career fulfilment and happiness with a well balanced approach to work and play? Our business coaches operate their own coaching practice under The Happiness Institute business services franchise banner. They are solution focused people who value relationships, who provide outstanding customer service, who love creating change and helping people and organsiations to flourish.
09.10.2008
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